Sticks and stones

You know this saying "Sticks and stones can break my bones but words will never harm me"?
I always admire people who say" I don't care what other people think or say about me". Because I can never say that. I always want people to like me, and if they don't I am devastated. I guess its because I am often insecure. Today I met Ella in town. There were two new girls and an older man, a new visitor too. We greeted them and chatted for a bit and the older man introduced us to the one girl who was his friend. He said he wished she was more than that...

[9:00] Malla Lamplight: He is... my dear... friend
[9:00] thomnus Magic: i am sad to say that i am not any of that
[9:01] thomnus Magic: but i am hoping that i can change that
[9:01] thomnus Magic: one way or the other
[9:01] Gera Heliosense: Oh" She looks at thomnus and smiles innocently"You want to win her heart, thats so romantic"
[9:01] Malla Lamplight blush deepens
[9:02] Malla Lamplight smiles
[9:02] Elaesa Darcy rolls her eyes at Gera's innocent routine. "Oh give it a rest."
[9:02] thomnus Magic: well not only her heart
[9:02] Barbie Sweetwater listens intently to the conversation
[9:02] Gera Heliosense turns to look at Ella confused" What you mean, Ella?"
[9:04] Elaesa Darcy's eyes narrow as she turns to Gera. She lowers her voice, her comment only audible to Gera. "I saw you shove that dildo inside that woman...someone you didn't know who had done nothing to you.....just to save your own skin. The innocent act doesn't fly with me any longer, seabreeze."
[9:05] Barbie Sweetwater is unable to understand what Ella says to Seabreeze, the coment obviously not intended for her. She gives a quizicall look and then shrugs her shoulders
[9:06] Gera Heliosense goes pale suddenly. She casts her eyes down, swallows a few times:" You know...Ella..I was never as strong and brave as you...yes I was scared and wanted to save my skin...and believe me ...things like that haunt me"
[9:07] Elaesa Darcy shakes her head, "Save it, seabreeze, for someone who's still buying your act." She turns to barbie and her smile brightens, "So, have you found a place to stay, barbie?"
[9:07] Barbie Sweetwater hears Seabreeze's reply and shudders
[9:08] Barbie Sweetwater giggles at Ella and answers, "No, I have not found a place yet. I have just been sleeping in the forest when I need to rest."
[9:09] Gera Heliosense swallows again, she blinks some tears away, sits upright and starts riding on, trying to keep up a smile.
[9:09] Barbie Sweetwater watches the Seabreeze ride off, seeing the obviouse distress in her face, hoping she will be ok.

When I was around the corner, I stopped. My throat was hurting from swallowing down the tears and I couldn't keep up the smile any longer. Ella's words were still in my head and it was hurting.